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The Nigerian Parents' Child-raising strategy

Firstly, growing up with Nigerian parents is mega interesting.Reflecting on the things they often force us to do would leave many laughing hysterically.They make us serve them compulsorily.If you tried to stand against your parents there's a chance that you could win series of slaps doing so.
I came across this today on Nairaland and I thought I should share. I am still laughing though.
Chances are you would probably do same for your children too.
1. When You're Sent On Unnecessary Errands
Nigerian mums are known for sending their children's on annoying errands.Imagine being called by your mum from a distance only for her to ask you to get her something within her reach.

2. When There's A Reason For You Failing At Something
Nigerian parents love to jump into conclusion.Trying to explain a situation to them is almost impossible.Nigerian parents would be like..
"Why wouldn't you hit your head, when you wouldn't face where you're going..."

3. Are You Ok?
Nigerian parents are not checking your mental health here, when they say this, they're trying to call your attention to your stupidity.

4. When You're Being Eyed In Public/Event
Please don't be carried away when you go out with your Nigerian mum.She expects you to check her face for signs.Don't eat when she blinks her eyes funnily, you do so and you're dead.

5. When You're Expected To Cry Without Making Noise
When your parents beat you and threaten you about crying.. You hear words like!
"Hold it! If I hear pim..."

6. When Your Actions Are Being Justified
Parents justify their childrens' actions and form a new reason to lash out at them.
"Why won't You talk back at me when you have started developing Breast?"

7. When Parents Don't Want To Accept Defeat
Sometimes parents feel they have gone overboard with certain issues but still try to cover up their mistakes.They find a way of covering their own fault and make their childrens victim again.
"You're as tall as I am now, why wouldn't you talk to me like that".

8. When They Want To Be Dramatic
Parents know they could move their children to emotion by crying and acting sad.They say things like.
"After everything I've done for you, I carried you in my womb for nine months".Trust me, you would end up in tears yourself.

9. When Your Mum Cheats You By Collecting Money From You
Mother have interesting attributes.They assume the role of a bank when someone gives you money.When you try to have your money back, you would be told.
"All the food you're been eaten in this house was given to me in the market freely abi?".

10. When Your Parents Want To End Up Chastising Session
We all know parents don't get tired of correcting their childrens either by beating or lashing them with words.However, they have a unique way of concluding their speeches.

"We would keep telling you the truth, the rest is totally up to you.If you continue, you're doing yourself.
11. I did not kill my mother.. so u can't kill me... if u say u will kill me.. I will kill u first!
Hilarious!!! It sure did happen to you, I have counted mine.

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